Contempt isn’t a guaranteed sign your marriage is over, but both you and your husband have to see how your words and actions are affecting your marriage.You both need to be willing to work on your relationship.One of the most troubling warning signs your marriage is over is when both you and your husband refuse to accept responsibility.If you have a feeling your marriage can’t be saved, read How to Know if Divorce is the Best Decision.How do you respond to a husband who speaks to you with contempt? Talk to a marriage counselor, pastor with counseling experience, or a trusted family friend.Learn how to cope with your feelings and how to set boundaries with your husband.But time passes, and the stress of daily life and kids and jobs and money and house and aging parents and health issues take a toll…and you find that you don’t have the time and patience it takes to be polite.
“When we communicate in this state, we are truly mean,” writes Ellie Lisitsa in The Four Horsemen: Contempt on The Gottman Institute’s blog about strengthening relationships.
He tries to make me feel like a horrible person and he attacks the things I say and do.
After he says all these mean things to me he wants me to act as though everything is alright. but I’m feeling like I could crawl up in a ball and die. I think so but it would help to get an outside opinion.” According to marriage expert John Gottman, expressing contempt is one of the signs your marriage is over.
“Sliding Into Marriage” and “Premarital Cycling” are two signs your marriage is over or may be ending, according to Dr. He is a relationship expert on premarital predictors of marital happiness, and he shared these two signs of unhealthy relationships on his article 3 Warning Signs That Predict Divorce Early in a Relationship…. Couples often have low levels of commitment and end up sliding into marriage instead of making a very conscious and clear decision to be committed to their future spouse.
This frequently happens when couples live together, but aren’t officially married yet.