From then on, that was your principal identity: The Smart One.
Especially if you had a sibling who was better looking than you, in which case she (or he) was The Pretty One.
Unless you actually convey femininity as a woman or masculinity as a man, you're not going to attract a suitable companion of the opposite sex. You're exceptionally talented at getting in the way of your own romantic success.
Part of the issue is this: When all of your personal energy is concentrated in the head, it never gets a chance to trickle down to the heart, or, god forbid, the groin. Here's an incontrovertible fact: Every one of your ancestors survived to reproductive age and got it on at least once with a member of the opposite sex. And even further back to monkeys, to lizards, to the first amphibian that crawled out of the slime, the fish that preceded that amphibian, the worm before the fish and the amoeba that preceded the worm. E., the culmination of that miraculously unbroken line of succession, you, .
Dating is at best another extracurricular, number six or number seven down the list, somewhere between Model UN and intramural badminton.
At this point, you have three choices: A) Loosen up B) Do a very thorough search all over the planet and be prepared to move to Duesseldorf OR C) Join a monastery. The purpose of relationship (and perhaps all of life) is to practice the loving. Nobody's asking to lower your standards here; you should still spend time only with worthwhile company.It may get you a first date, but it's probably not going to get you a second date.And it certainly won't bring you lasting love and fulfillment.Of course, as noted above, things only get worse once you graduate.And if you're frustrated with your love life, you just might try to compensate by working harder and achieving even more to fill that void.So it only makes sense that in the romantic arena, it should work the same way. The more stuff I do, the more accomplishments and awards I have, the more girls (or boys) will like me. Please say I'm right, because I've spent a LOT of time and energy accumulating this mental jewelry, and I'm going to be really bummed if you tell me it's not going to get me laid.